Alone w/ Nanny

Mia is alone with the nanny today. Even though Mike and I went out for a date last Friday and left her with Ruka, we were only ten minutes away. Today it's her first full day without mommy, daddy or grandma. I am a little anxious at work. Nanny turned the cell phone off probably intentionally so she does not get disturbed but I want to talk to her to check on the baby! Anyways, trust and be trusted. It's hard to be a first time mom and learn to give trust.

Working hard

cooking, cleaning, looking after baby. Busy busy without mom here. Mia's hitting her six month growth spur and wants to eat around the clock. Still not loving the bottle so much. It's such a pain.

Mike and I teamed up today taking turns to watch over her while doing house chores. I never realized how much my mom did around the house. Now it will be a huge task ahead of us once we return full time to work next week.

Lost

My mom's gone. The leftover in the refrigerator is a cruel reminder of it when I came back home from work. She is just airborne and in fourteen hours plus a tranfer flight later, she will be home, no longer needing to cook for me and clean for me and babysit. I feel lost without her.

Two Events

Mia accomplished another milestone today. She rolled over on her own. I missed it as everyone else. I was at yoga. Mike put her in the floor gym on her back and went to the family room. When he came back, Mia was on her tummy. He thought my mom flipped her but my mom was cooking. They were delighted to learn that she did it on her own. I hope to see her in action next time.

In the morning we tried for the first time to give Mia solid food. Mike grinded brown rice into powder and we cooked it for a long time until it was soft. I tried one spoonful. However she was pushing the spoon out and was not interested. When I tried the third time, she pushed my spoon away and the cereal dropped on her chest. My mom was happy that Mia rejected the food because she was so worried baby would get indigestion from the brown rice. Well, I guess she is just not ready yet. We will wait for a couple more weeks. But I won't grind the rice any more. I've found out that there is a ton of premade baby cereal choices at the store.

Babysitting

Yesterday we went to Pete's wedding and asked my in-laws to come babysit. Mia was incredibly good. She took the bottle while she was fully awake, which never happens! My father in law did most of the work, changing diapers, bathing her and etc. We were gone for six hours from 4 to 10 PM. Apparently they finished one big bottle of wine and had some good fun.

Mike and I dressed up and had some fun as well at the wedding. Felt like we were on a date. I even had a chance to curl my hair at the hairdresser for the occassion. Noteworthy about the wedding, one of the groomsmen fainted as the bride and groom were about to exchange rings. It was like a scene on that TV show "America's Funnies Video". Ridiculous but I would never forget this wedding.

Mommy Club

Two months ago, Becky from the neighborhood asked me if I'd like to join a book club. Given the demands of a new born, I thought it would be really intimidating to commit to it. When my mom heard about it, she encouraged me to go ahead, one of the reasons being I did not have a mom network.

When I was single till when I got married but had no strings attached, I had little interest in children or the mundane topics about children. I seldom engaged in conversations about them. I avoid moms "at all cost" because to me, their only interest is in children and they are boring. I also found it a social conspiracy for the parents camp. My theory was it was all but a hoax to attract more folks into the camp. Parenthood is so damn hard and sacrificing that they simply paint a rosy picture of it and continue to sell it to others to suck them into the circle and suffer as well.

Until now... I am part of this conspiracy.

We had two book club meetings. Choosing which books to read is beside the point. The fact that all these women, all mothers of two or more children, most of them still working and some at very high power jobs such as the CFO of an international communication company, loved being able to go away from their husbands, sipping a glass of pinot grigio, chatting and laughing, stealing a moment away from their household chores to have a little fun themselves.

Being a first time mom, I was embraced by all of them. I am the young one to the club. They gave me unsolicited mommy advice, which I despised in the past but now eagerly listened to. I felt a keen sense of comradery among these moms. I am now one of those women who yap non-stop about mundane things and get emotional at the thought of leaving my baby and heading back to work. They listened and understood me. The empathy and knowing without me explaining myself is enough to make me feel included. It's the strangest thing. It's as if any moms, anywhere, any race, any nationality, could form a front, that could shoulder the world's weight and shelter each other. The kinship is unconditional and warming. I see their paths into motherhood, maturing as they are now. Maria said she pumped for eight months after going back to work. To keep the supply up, she pumped on airplanes, airport restrooms during business trips... I see strength and commitment in these women and I feel encouraged. It's a whirlwind tirp being tossed into motherhood. I thought I'd never be ready. Now that I am a mom, I have a long way to go but I do not flinch any more.

Shaved

We shaved Mia's head today. She now looks like a Tomboy. The Chinese usually shave baby's hair before the first birthday. It's supposed to stimulate hair growth. I was delaying this day for months. Even though I know her hair would grow back especially since she had such good hair since birth, it was a little difficult to let go. I got used to stroking her hair while holding her and I love her little parrot hair style. Oh well, here is a change!

Happy Birthday, Mommy

It's my birthday weekend. We decided to take baby to the Alexandria waterfront. I love dressing her up in girlie little dresses. It's just like playing with a doll. Mia has two cowlics therefore the hair on top of her head is dueling with each other. Mike used some water to press her forever sticking out hair down. She did not look herself afterwards but none the less she is my precious little pricess.I remember last year this time, my mom just came for a visit and I broke the news to her. I was also suffering from constant first trimester nausea then. Time flies, look how big she's grown now!